📝🐱🛫 Household Policy Update: Annual Leave Has Limits

I have recently been informed that my humans were on holiday.

For three weeks.

Three. Entire. Weeks.

Apparently, humans are entitled to something called annual leave. This involves packing far too many clothes into suitcases, checking several times whether the doors are locked, and then voluntarily leaving the most important member of the household behind.

Me.

Now, before anyone contacts the authorities, I should clarify that suitable replacement staff had been arranged.

And I must admit, they performed exceptionally well.

Meals were served. My facilities were maintained. Appropriate attention was provided. Standards remained high.

In fact, the temporary staff showed considerable promise.

They even managed to establish a special treat routine.

A daily special treat routine.

I had not requested this officially, of course. I merely positioned myself strategically at certain times, looked at them in a meaningful manner and allowed the training process to develop naturally.

They learned remarkably quickly.

I have made a note of this in their personnel file.

However.

Excellent temporary staffing does not alter the fundamental issue.

For three weeks, I was without my permanent, dedicated, daily, 24-hour household service.

This is unacceptable.

My humans appear to believe that because I am an independent cat, I do not require them to be physically present at all times.

This is a serious misunderstanding of the word independent.

Independent means I decide when I require their services.

It does not mean they are free to disappear to another country until further notice.

What if I suddenly require a particular cushion?

What if a door needs opening, despite another perfectly functional door being available?

What if I decide at 3.17 in the morning that somebody should be awake?

These are not matters that can simply be postponed until after a holiday.

Upon their return, my humans seemed delighted to see me.

Naturally.

I conducted the appropriate inspection of the luggage, accepted their apologies in the form of attention and resumed supervision of the household.

There will, however, be consequences.

Firstly, the new treat routine introduced by the replacement staff is now considered established household policy.

It would be deeply unprofessional to reverse an operational improvement simply because the temporary management period has ended.

Secondly, future applications for annual leave exceeding a reasonable number of days will require approval from the Office of Mrs. Cotton.

Applications should be submitted well in advance.

Approval is not guaranteed.

I am, after all, a fair ruler.

But I am also a cat who has just discovered that substitute staff can be trained to dispense extra treats.

My humans may wish to consider that before booking their next holiday.

Household Policy Update:
Permanent 24/7 service is not a luxury. It is a contractual obligation.

Holiday requests remain subject to royal approval.

Yours,
Mrs. Cotton 🐱🐾