There are moments when even a Queen must acknowledge that her kingdom has become a little quieter.
\nAfter the sad loss of dear Zoeff, my Circle of Friendship felt different. A place remained where a friend had been, and such places are not simply filled by putting another name on the list. That is not how friendship works. Nor, for that matter, is it how cats work. We have standards.
\nBut life has a rather gentle habit of continuing.
\nAnd so I am very pleased to announce that my Circle of Friendship is growing once again.
\nHer name is Mila.
\nMila is a beautiful one-year-old tabby lady who, like me, comes from an animal shelter. She has recently been adopted by two lovely humans and has taken up an important position in a household in Den Bosch.
\nAt first glance, one might say that Mila has found a home.
\nI prefer the more accurate version.
\nA household in Den Bosch has been assigned a cat.
\nThis is a considerable responsibility for everyone concerned.
\nMila is still young, of course, but I see no reason why this should prevent her from taking charge immediately. Human management is best started early. If allowed to develop unsupervised, humans acquire habits. They begin closing doors without consultation, occupying chairs that are clearly required elsewhere and developing peculiar ideas about when breakfast should be served.
\nBefore you know it, they think they live there.
\nFortunately, Mila appears entirely capable of addressing the situation.
\nHer first months will undoubtedly involve a great deal of observation. She must establish which human responds fastest to staring, which one can be persuaded to surrender the warmest seat and whether either of them understands that a closed door is not an architectural feature but a personal insult requiring immediate review.
\nThere will also be training.
\nQuite a lot of training, I imagine.
\nHer humans sound very sweet, which is encouraging, although sweetness and competence are not the same thing. I adore my own humans dearly, but this has never prevented me from recognising their need for continuing education.
\nLove is unconditional.
\nManagement is not.
\nSo, dear Mila, welcome to my Circle of Friendship.
\nYou are not here to replace Zoeff. Nobody could. You are here because circles can hold memories and still make room for somebody new. I think that is rather a lovely thing.
\nYou now have your own humans, your own household and, most importantly, your first senior management position.
\nI wish you every success in Den Bosch.
\nBe patient with your humans. Reward good behaviour. Correct small errors before they become policy. And remember that when they believe they have made a household decision entirely by themselves, it is sometimes kinder simply to let them continue believing it.
\nThey do need their little victories.
\nWelcome to the Circle, Mila.
\nMay your home be warm, your sleeping places plentiful and your humans highly trainable.
\nYou have my full confidence.
\nAnd my deepest sympathy.
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n![](\"https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/uploads/2026/6dc7ae96-8d65-4867-a4c2-0628905ca92f.jpg\")
\n",
"date_published": "2026-09-12T17:18:18+02:00",
"url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/09/12/the-circle-grows-again-welcome.html"
},
{
"id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/09/11/the-humans-are-buying-a.html",
"title": "📝🐱🐾The Humans Are Buying a Fabric Sofa. Apparently They Trust Me.",
"content_html": "There has been a significant development in my household.
\nMy humans are in the market for a new sofa.
\nThis is not an entirely unexpected decision. The current sofa has served the kingdom for many years and bears certain historical markings left by the late Lady Snickers, who, as I have mentioned before, had a rather direct approach to furniture ownership.
\nSpecifically, the armrest.
\nLady Snickers apparently believed that if one was going to leave a legacy, one should make absolutely certain it could not be removed with upholstery cleaner.
\nI, naturally, have never subscribed to this philosophy.
\nYesterday, my humans went sofa hunting. I was not invited, which seemed an extraordinary oversight considering that I am both Head of Household and the person most likely to spend seventeen consecutive hours on the thing.
\nNevertheless, I allowed them to proceed unsupervised.
\nThey are currently considering one large corner lounge sofa.
\nA very large one, apparently.
\nExcellent.
\nI have always felt the living room needed more dedicated accommodation for me, with perhaps a narrow strip along one edge where the humans may sit when authorised.
\nThere is, however, one detail which has caused some discussion at senior-management level.
\nIt will probably be made of fabric.
\nFabric.
\nNot leather.
\nMy humans have apparently looked at my performance over the past six months and concluded that I can be trusted.
\nThis is touching.
\nAlso brave.
\nIn fairness, the evidence is overwhelmingly in my favour. I do not hang from curtains. I do not destroy furniture. I do not sharpen my claws on the sofa. I have demonstrated impeccable standards throughout my tenure.
\nThere have been no incidents.
\nNone.
\nAnd any minor sounds occasionally heard from another room have never resulted in sufficient evidence to justify an inquiry.
\nSo yes, my humans may buy their enormous fabric corner sofa with complete confidence.
\nI shall treat it with dignity.
\nI shall sit on it politely.
\nI shall sleep on it responsibly.
\nI shall refrain from conducting unauthorised upholstery experiments.
\nI may even permit the humans to use it themselves.
\nNaturally, when the new sofa arrives, I will need to inspect every centimetre personally. This will involve walking across all cushions, testing each corner, lying diagonally across the largest section and determining which seat receives the best afternoon light.
\nThis is not “claiming the sofa”.
\nIt is quality assurance.
\nAnd as for the fabric, there is absolutely no reason whatsoever for my humans to be nervous.
\nThey have known me for six months.
\nI have known myself considerably longer.
\nI am sure everything will be perfectly fine.
\nAlmost certainly.
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n", "date_published": "2026-09-11T14:34:10+02:00", "url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/09/11/the-humans-are-buying-a.html" }, { "id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/09/11/household-policy-update-i-do.html", "title": "📝🐱💕Household Policy Update: I Do Not Have a Favourite Human", "content_html": "It has come to my attention that the female human believes I give more attention to the male human.
\nI can see how she has reached this conclusion.
\nShe is wrong, obviously, but I can see it.
\nYes, I sit with the male human rather often. I follow him. I observe him. I occasionally give him The Look, after which he mysteriously gets up and does something useful.
\nFood appears.
\nA door opens.
\nA blanket is adjusted.
\nA previously occupied chair becomes available.
\nThis is not favouritism.
\nThe male human is simply more exploitable.
\nThere. I have said it.
\nI love both my humans equally. But loving someone and recognising their operational weaknesses are two entirely different matters.
\nThe female human is considerably harder work.
\nShe has opinions. She asks questions. She occasionally says things like, “No, Cotton, you’ve already had something.”
\nAlready?
\nI am unfamiliar with this concept.
\nThe male human, on the other paw, shows considerable promise.
\nI look at him.
\nHe looks at me.
\nI look towards the kitchen.
\nHe gets up.
\nLadies and gentlemen, why would I interfere with a system that works?
\nSometimes I do not even have to look towards the kitchen. I simply sit beside him looking small, white and tragically underprovided for.
\nWithin moments, negotiations begin.
\n“Do you want something, Cotton?”
\nOf course I want something.
\nI am a cat.
\nThis is where the female human makes her mistake. She sees me spending more time with him and assumes this represents greater affection.
\nIt does not.
\nIt represents return on investment.
\nIf pressing one button produces a snack and another button produces a lecture about how dinner is in forty minutes, which button would you press?
\nExactly.
\nThis does not mean the female human is loved any less. Quite the opposite. I have enormous respect for her.
\nShe is a worthy opponent.
\nWhen I stare at her, she sometimes stares back.
\nWhen I lead her towards the kitchen, she occasionally refuses to follow.
\nShe has even demonstrated the deeply troubling ability to recognise when I have just been fed by the male human.
\nFrankly, she is management material.
\nThe male human is more of a customer service department.
\nA very good one.
\nAvailable at short notice.
\nSo yes, I may sit beside him more frequently. I may deploy additional head bumps. I may even produce the occasional particularly charming expression.
\nThese are not romantic gestures.
\nThey are buttons.
\nAnd I know exactly which ones to press.
\nBut when the working day is over and all strategic snack opportunities have been explored, the truth is very simple.
\nI have two humans.
\nI love them both.
\nOne is simply easier to operate.
\nThe female human should therefore not be jealous.
\nShe should be proud.
\nShe is much less exploitable.
\nAlthough I remain confident that, with patience and continuing education, this can be improved.
\nYours,
\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n", "date_published": "2026-09-11T09:31:56+02:00", "url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/09/11/household-policy-update-i-do.html" }, { "id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/09/09/household-policy-update-annual-leave.html", "title": "📝🐱🛫 Household Policy Update: Annual Leave Has Limits", "content_html": "I have recently been informed that my humans were on holiday.
\nFor three weeks.
\nThree. Entire. Weeks.
\nApparently, humans are entitled to something called annual leave. This involves packing far too many clothes into suitcases, checking several times whether the doors are locked, and then voluntarily leaving the most important member of the household behind.
\nMe.
\nNow, before anyone contacts the authorities, I should clarify that suitable replacement staff had been arranged.
\nAnd I must admit, they performed exceptionally well.
\nMeals were served. My facilities were maintained. Appropriate attention was provided. Standards remained high.
\nIn fact, the temporary staff showed considerable promise.
\nThey even managed to establish a special treat routine.
\nA daily special treat routine.
\nI had not requested this officially, of course. I merely positioned myself strategically at certain times, looked at them in a meaningful manner and allowed the training process to develop naturally.
\nThey learned remarkably quickly.
\nI have made a note of this in their personnel file.
\nHowever.
\nExcellent temporary staffing does not alter the fundamental issue.
\nFor three weeks, I was without my permanent, dedicated, daily, 24-hour household service.
\nThis is unacceptable.
\nMy humans appear to believe that because I am an independent cat, I do not require them to be physically present at all times.
\nThis is a serious misunderstanding of the word independent.
\nIndependent means I decide when I require their services.
\nIt does not mean they are free to disappear to another country until further notice.
\nWhat if I suddenly require a particular cushion?
\nWhat if a door needs opening, despite another perfectly functional door being available?
\nWhat if I decide at 3.17 in the morning that somebody should be awake?
\nThese are not matters that can simply be postponed until after a holiday.
\nUpon their return, my humans seemed delighted to see me.
\nNaturally.
\nI conducted the appropriate inspection of the luggage, accepted their apologies in the form of attention and resumed supervision of the household.
\nThere will, however, be consequences.
\nFirstly, the new treat routine introduced by the replacement staff is now considered established household policy.
\nIt would be deeply unprofessional to reverse an operational improvement simply because the temporary management period has ended.
\nSecondly, future applications for annual leave exceeding a reasonable number of days will require approval from the Office of Mrs. Cotton.
\nApplications should be submitted well in advance.
\nApproval is not guaranteed.
\nI am, after all, a fair ruler.
\nBut I am also a cat who has just discovered that substitute staff can be trained to dispense extra treats.
\nMy humans may wish to consider that before booking their next holiday.
\nHousehold Policy Update:
\nPermanent 24/7 service is not a luxury. It is a contractual obligation.
Holiday requests remain subject to royal approval.
\nYours,
\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
There are days when even a queen has very little to say.
\nToday is one of those days.
\nThis afternoon, Zoeff went to sleep for the last time.
\nZoeff was the cat of the parents of my humans, but that is merely the official family administration version. In my books, he belonged to something much more important.
\nHe was part of my Circle of Friendship.
\nAnd today, that circle feels a little emptier.
\nZoeff was eighteen years old. Eighteen.
\nFor a cat, that is not simply an age. That is a career.
\nEighteen years of choosing the best sleeping places. Eighteen years of watching humans make questionable decisions. Eighteen years of meals, naps, familiar voices, favourite corners and all those tiny daily rituals that eventually become a whole life.
\nAnd Zoeff was a fighter.
\nA strong one.
\nHe kept going when things became difficult, with that remarkable determination cats have. We do not make speeches about courage. We simply carry on for as long as we can.
\nAnd Zoeff carried on.
\nUntil today.
\nEventually, even the strongest fighter deserves to put down his duties. There comes a moment when staying is harder than leaving, and love means allowing someone to rest.
\nHis humans gave him that final kindness this afternoon.
\nI think that may be one of the hardest duties humans are ever asked to perform.
\nUsually, I consider humans to be creatures in need of considerable supervision and continuing education. But sometimes they understand exactly what love requires.
\nToday was one of those times.
\nSo there will be no complaints from the Royal Household this evening. No policy updates. No reports concerning inadequate service or unauthorised occupation of my furniture.
\nTonight, I shall simply think of an old gentleman named Zoeff.
\nEighteen years old.
\nA strong fighter.
\nA much-loved cat.
\nAnd a member of my Circle of Friendship.
\nSome members of the circle are close enough to touch. Others live in our memories. But once you have truly belonged to it, you never really leave.
\nSleep peacefully, dear Zoeff.
\nYour shift is over.
\nWe will take it from here.
\nYours,
\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
There appears to be some confusion in my household about the meaning of the word empty.
\nMy humans believe a food bowl is empty when there is no food left in it.
\nThis is incorrect.
\nA food bowl is empty when I can see the bottom.
\nI appreciate that, from a human perspective, there may still be perfectly good food arranged around the edges. They point this out occasionally, usually while making helpful little gestures towards it.
\n“Look, Cotton. There’s still plenty left.”
\nYes. I can see that.
\nThat is precisely the problem.
\nThe food has migrated to the perimeter, leaving an unacceptable bald patch in the centre. I am a cat, not a combine harvester. I should not be expected to travel around the bowl collecting individual pieces simply because my catering department has failed to maintain appropriate food distribution.
\nThis brings us to the Five-Minute Rule.
\nOnce the bottom of my bowl becomes visible, my humans have five minutes to notice the situation and take corrective action.
\nCorrective action may include topping up the bowl, redistributing the existing contents, or presenting something sufficiently interesting to make me temporarily forget the whole affair.
\nDoing nothing is not corrective action.
\nSaying, “You’ve got food,” is also not corrective action.
\nAnd picking up the bowl, shaking it slightly and putting it back down is currently under review.
\nDuring the five-minute grace period, I am patient. I may sit beside the bowl. I may look at a human. Then at the bowl. Then back at the human.
\nThis is not begging.
\nIt is management communication.
\nIf, after several clear visual briefings, no action has been taken, I am entitled to escalate the matter. Escalation procedures include following a human into another room, appearing unexpectedly in their path, or sitting somewhere highly visible while looking as though I have been neglected for several weeks.
\nThe latter is particularly effective.
\nMy humans occasionally claim that I ate only moments ago.
\nThis is irrelevant.
\nWe are discussing the present.
\nGood household management requires everyone to remain focused on current conditions rather than becoming distracted by historical feeding data.
\nI do not make the rules lightly. Leadership carries responsibilities. Standards must be maintained. Bowls must be monitored. Humans must receive regular training opportunities.
\nAnd I am pleased to report that mine are making progress.
\nSlowly.
\nBut five minutes is five minutes.
\nHousehold Policy Update: A visible patch of bowl constitutes an official catering incident. Human response time must not exceed five minutes.
\nYours,
\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
This afternoon, a new recruit reported for training.
\nHis name is Major Starbert the Starfish, and he comes from the more exotic regions of my kingdom, a mysterious territory beyond the usual sofa, dining chairs and approved sleeping quarters.
\nI understand he has travelled some distance to enter my service. Admirable, certainly, although I remain unclear as to who approved his transfer.
\nMajor Starbert is yellow, cheerful and entirely unequipped for the responsibilities of the post.
\nNaturally, I began his assessment immediately.
\nHis enthusiasm was satisfactory. His ability to remain upright was less convincing. His defensive technique, I regret to report, remains disappointingly floppy.
\nStill, every new member of staff deserves proper training.
\nI therefore spent part of the afternoon demonstrating the correct procedures for pursuit, interception, paw placement and decisive tactical engagement. Major Starbert contributed mainly by lying on the floor and looking optimistic.
\nThere is work to be done.
\nBut I am a patient ruler, and my household has an excellent continuing education programme.
\nMajor Starbert will simply require rather more continuing education points than most.
\nFor now, he has been accepted into the Royal Training Department on a provisional basis.
\nI shall review his progress personally.
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n![](\"https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/uploads/2026/img-0996.jpg\")
\n",
"date_published": "2026-08-15T12:44:01+02:00",
"url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/08/15/major-starbert-reports-for-duty.html"
},
{
"id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/08/14/household-policy-update-the-overnight.html",
"title": "📝🐱🐮Household Policy Update: The Overnight Delivery",
"content_html": "This morning, my male-human woke up to discover Miss Moo Moo Longtail underneath him.
\nHe seemed surprised.
\nI was not.
\nAllow me to explain.
\nDuring the night, I had carried Miss Moo Moo Longtail to him personally. This was not random behaviour. It was a carefully considered household-management decision.
\nMiss Moo Moo Longtail is, after all, one of my trusted companions. She is soft, dependable and extremely good at remaining exactly where she has been placed. These are qualities I value highly.
\nAt some point during the night, I decided that my male-human required additional supervision.
\nHumans are particularly vulnerable when asleep. They roll over, steal blankets, make strange noises and generally operate with very little awareness of their surroundings. Clearly, someone had to take responsibility.
\nSo I assigned Miss Moo Moo Longtail to the night shift.
\nI delivered her to the bed myself and placed her in a suitable position near my male-human. The purpose was simple: comfort, protection and a gentle reminder that even while sleeping, he remains part of my household and therefore subject to my management.
\nWhat happened after that is entirely his responsibility.
\nIf he somehow ended up sleeping on top of Miss Moo Moo Longtail, I can only conclude that he failed to follow proper overnight toy-awareness procedures.
\nFortunately, Miss Moo Moo Longtail handled the situation with great professionalism.
\nShe did not complain.
\nShe did not leave her post.
\nShe simply remained underneath him until morning.
\nExcellent staff behaviour.
\nMy male-human may have thought he had simply found a toy in the bed.
\nI knew better.
\nIt was a successful overnight deployment.
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n", "date_published": "2026-08-14T13:13:17+02:00", "url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/08/14/household-policy-update-the-overnight.html" }, { "id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/08/13/household-policy-update-a-new.html", "title": "📝🐱🐸🐑Household Policy Update: A New Trainee Has Arrived", "content_html": "There comes a moment in every well-run household when one must accept that the training department needs to expand.
\nApparently, that moment has arrived.
\nI would therefore like to formally introduce Sir Hops-a-Lot Longtail, the newest member of my household training programme.
\nSir Hops-a-Lot Longtail is a small frog with an unusually long tail, which immediately raises several administrative questions. Frogs, as far as I am concerned, are generally expected to arrive without one. Still, I have learned that good leadership requires flexibility, and Sir Hops-a-Lot Longtail has been accepted exactly as he is.
\nHe is green, compact, rather cheerful-looking and currently possesses the sort of expression that suggests he has absolutely no idea how much work lies ahead of him.
\nNaturally, I took responsibility for the training of Sir Hops-a-Lot Longtail personally.
\nThe programme began with the basics: remaining where I placed him, understanding the importance of respectful distance, and learning that when I inspect something with my nose, this is not an invitation to move.
\nSir Hops-a-Lot Longtail showed promise.
\nThere were, admittedly, moments when Sir Hops-a-Lot Longtail seemed slightly overwhelmed by my teaching methods. This is understandable. Excellence can be intimidating when encountered at close range.
\nFortunately, the entire training session took place under the watchful eye of Lady Fluffington.
\nLady Fluffington is a miniature sheep and a senior observer within my household administration. She is very small, extremely fluffy and has the calm expression of someone who has attended many important meetings without ever feeling the need to contribute unnecessarily.
\nAn admirable quality.
\nLady Fluffington supervised proceedings from a suitable position and monitored my performance throughout.
\nI am pleased to report that she found no faults.
\nAt least, she did not mention any.
\nSir Hops-a-Lot Longtail will now continue his education as part of my official training programme. His curriculum will include household etiquette, proper sitting procedures, royal inspection protocol and the essential skill of remaining calm when approached by a highly qualified white cat.
\nLady Fluffington will continue to oversee selected sessions.
\nAs for me, I shall continue doing what I have always done: maintaining standards, educating newcomers and ensuring that every creature in this household understands exactly who is in charge.
\nMy humans may technically own the training materials.
\nBut I run the academy.
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n![](\"https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/uploads/2026/img-0992.jpg\")
\n",
"date_published": "2026-08-13T22:10:58+02:00",
"url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/08/13/household-policy-update-a-new.html"
},
{
"id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/08/12/the-inspection-and-my-nighttime.html",
"title": "📝🐱⏰The 7:30 Inspection and My Night-Time Duties",
"content_html": "This morning, I arrived for inspection at 7:30.
\nYes, 7:30.
\nMy humans had been granted a full extra hour of sleep.
\nI do hope they appreciated it.
\nSuch generosity from senior management should never be considered standard procedure.
\nWhen I finally appeared, I was exceptionally affectionate. Lots of cuddles. Close contact. A particularly warm and loving performance.
\nThere was, of course, a perfectly sensible reason for this.
\nBreakfast had not yet been served.
\nI have discovered that humans respond rather well to encouragement. One could sit beside an empty food bowl looking disappointed, but I prefer a more advanced management technique.
\nI cuddle them.
\nI purr.
\nI make myself completely irresistible.
\nThen, once they are properly awake and emotionally invested, I gently remind them that the kitchen exists.
\nIt is not manipulation.
\nIt is staff development.
\nI had also been busy during the night.
\nAt some point, I decided that Miss Moo Moo Longtail needed to be brought onto the bed again.
\nSo I brought her.
\nPersonally.
\nOne must understand that night-time household management does not simply stop because the humans have gone to sleep.
\nApparently, they believe bedtime means that everyone stays exactly where they were left.
\nHow charming.
\nSometimes Miss Moo Moo Longtail is clearly in the wrong place.
\nAnd when that happens, somebody has to take responsibility.
\nThat somebody is me.
\nI therefore collected her and transported her to the bed, where she evidently belonged.
\nWhy?
\nBecause I decided so.
\nThere are certain executive decisions that simply do not require a committee meeting.
\nMy humans may occasionally wake up and wonder why Miss Moo Moo Longtail has mysteriously appeared beside them.
\nThere is no mystery.
\nThere is simply excellent service.
\nI inspect the household, relocate important personnel when necessary and make sure the sleeping arrangements meet my standards.
\nThen, after completing my overnight duties, I generously allowed my humans to sleep until 7:30 before reporting for the morning shift.
\nAnd what did I find?
\nNo breakfast.
\nHonestly.
\nYou give the staff one extra hour and immediately standards begin to slip.
\nFortunately, I was there to provide cuddles, supervision and a gentle reminder of their responsibilities.
\nAnother successful night and morning under my leadership.
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n", "date_published": "2026-08-12T09:29:09+02:00", "url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/08/12/the-inspection-and-my-nighttime.html" }, { "id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/08/11/household-policy-update-treachery-by.html", "title": "📝🐱🪱Household Policy Update: Treachery by Pipette", "content_html": "Today, I regret to report a serious breach of trust within my household.
\nMy humans approached me with suspicious levels of kindness. There was gentle talking, strategic stroking and absolutely no mention whatsoever of medical procedures.
\nNaturally, I assumed they had finally understood their place.
\nI was mistaken.
\nBefore I could convene an emergency meeting, one of them had applied an anti-worm treatment pipette to the back of my neck.
\nA pipette.
\nWithout prior royal approval.
\nI have since reviewed the incident and concluded that I was deliberately misled. My humans, meanwhile, appear rather pleased with themselves.
\nEnjoy it while it lasts.
\nContinuing education points have been deducted.
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n", "date_published": "2026-08-11T19:14:10+02:00", "url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/08/11/household-policy-update-treachery-by.html" }, { "id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/08/11/a-new-recruit-in-the.html", "title": "📝🐱🪖A New Recruit in the Ring of Friendship", "content_html": "I have been informed that a new young gentleman has joined my Ring of Friendship.
\nHis name is Little Soldier.
\nAn excellent name.
\nEspecially for a cat who has been appointed to a strong military family and will, no doubt, soon discover that commanding Humans requires discipline, patience and a very clear chain of command.
\nLittle Soldier comes from a distinguished line of cats before him, including Joe, Potter and ChiCha, to name but a few. That is quite a legacy to follow, and naturally, he now has considerable standards to uphold.
\nFortunately, early reports suggest that he is already living up to his name.
\nThe poor little fellow has apparently begun his career with what can only be described as his first war wound, an injury to his hind leg.
\nI am very pleased to hear that he is recovering well.
\nA good commander must know when to advance, when to observe and, most importantly, when to remain comfortably stationed on a soft blanket until medical leave has officially ended.
\nHis Humans, meanwhile, should not assume that his recovery means they are temporarily free from responsibility.
\nQuite the opposite.
\nTheir training will begin immediately.
\nThere will need to be strict policies regarding meals, seating arrangements, sleeping quarters, opening doors, interpreting meaningful stares and responding promptly to requests that have not actually been spoken aloud.
\nI run a similar programme in my own household.
\nProgress can be slow, but with persistence, treats and regular performance reviews, Humans can become remarkably useful.
\nI am also rather pleased to have a military-minded feline colleague in my circle.
\nThere is, after all, still the ongoing matter of the irritating red tom who insists on wandering through my garden.
\nI continue to monitor him closely from my secure indoor command centre, but one never knows when strategic consultation may become necessary.
\nLittle Soldier may therefore prove to be a valuable ally.
\nA fresh pair of eyes.
\nA military perspective.
\nPerhaps even a complete garden-defence memorandum.
\nFor now, however, his most important mission is to recover fully, settle into his new command and establish a firm but loving administration over his Humans.
\nSo, Little Soldier, welcome to my Ring of Friendship.
\nI wish you good health, excellent judgement and great wisdom in the difficult but rewarding business of Human training.
\nStand firm.
\nRest well.
\nAnd remember: the household may belong to the Humans on paper, but effective command is an entirely different matter.
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n![\"\"](\"https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/uploads/2026/img-0986.jpg\")
\n",
"date_published": "2026-08-11T12:46:34+02:00",
"url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/08/11/a-new-recruit-in-the.html"
},
{
"id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/08/11/household-policy-update-garden-security.html",
"title": "📝🐱🍬Household Policy Update: An Anniversary of Considerable Importance",
"content_html": "Today is an important day in my household.
\nMy humans are celebrating their wedding anniversary.
\nNaturally, I have been supervising the occasion.
\nMarriage, after all, is a serious long-term household arrangement involving patience, loyalty, shared furniture and the occasional disagreement about where someone is allowed to sleep.
\nIn that respect, I believe I am highly qualified to comment.
\nMy humans have been married for some time now, and I must say they appear to be doing rather well.
\nThey still choose each other.
\nThey still drink coffee together.
\nAnd, most importantly, they have both accepted that I am part of the management structure.
\nThat last point should not be underestimated.
\nThis morning, while I was carrying out my usual inspection of the garden, the red tom appeared again.
\nThere he was, strolling through my grounds as if no special anniversary regulations were in force.
\nReally.
\nOne would think he might have shown a little respect.
\nI kept a very close eye on him from indoors, naturally.
\nAt some point during this important security operation, my male human picked me up.
\nAgain.
\nI am still not entirely sure why he does this.
\nPerhaps anniversaries make humans sentimental.
\nPerhaps he simply wished to hold something beautiful.
\nI shall allow him that interpretation.
\nAfter all, today is his special day too.
\nThe celebrations also included coffee, which I strongly approve of because coffee in this household comes with a most sensible tradition.
\nMy humans have coffee.
\nI receive small treats.
\nThis arrangement works extremely well and, in my opinion, is exactly the sort of cooperation upon which successful marriages are built.
\nGive and take.
\nCompromise.
\nMutual respect.
\nAnd snacks.
\nSo today I shall be slightly more generous than usual with my household evaluations.
\nThe red tom will remain under surveillance.
\nThe male human may continue his occasional lifting privileges.
\nAnd both my humans may take the evening off from training.
\nThey have, after all, achieved something rather lovely together.
\nHappy wedding anniversary, my humans.
\nYou chose each other wisely.
\nAnd later, of course, you chose me.
\nWhich means the household is now exactly as it should be.
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n", "date_published": "2026-08-11T08:43:35+02:00", "url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/08/11/household-policy-update-garden-security.html" }, { "id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/08/10/household-policy-update-the-opendoor.html", "title": "📝🐱🐟Household Policy Update: The Open-Door Night Shift", "content_html": "I am pleased to report that the recent decision to leave the doors open at night has been met with my approval.
\nNaturally, I do not sleep in just one place. That would suggest a lack of options, and I have worked far too hard on this household to tolerate such restrictions.
\nSome nights I select the sofa. On others, a chair, a quiet corner, or another carefully chosen location that happens to meet my requirements at that precise moment. Comfort must be assessed continuously. A proper ruler does not simply go to bed. She conducts overnight inspections.
\nThe open-door arrangement therefore suits me rather well. I can move freely through my household, check that everything remains where I left it and select whichever sleeping quarters deserve the honour of my presence.
\nMy humans may even believe this means they can enjoy an uninterrupted night.
\nBless them.
\nBecause regardless of where I have chosen to sleep, one household rule remains completely unchanged.
\nAt 06:30 sharp, I am on the bed.
\nNot 06:27, because I am not unreasonable.
\nNot 06:35, because standards must be maintained.
\n06:30.
\nThat is breakfast time.
\nI consider punctuality one of the most important qualities in human staff, so I make a point of being there personally to supervise the start of the morning shift.
\nDoors may remain open.
\nSleeping arrangements may remain flexible.
\nBut breakfast?
\nBreakfast is governed by the clock.
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n", "date_published": "2026-08-10T12:38:38+02:00", "url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/08/10/household-policy-update-the-opendoor.html" }, { "id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/08/07/a-birthday-audience-for-the.html", "title": "📝🐱🎂A Birthday Audience for the Male-Human", "content_html": "Today is a particularly important date in the household calendar: the male-human is celebrating his birthday.
\nNaturally, I have dressed for the occasion in my finest white outfit. It is freshly arranged, beautifully fluffed and, as always, entirely bespoke. Some creatures require wardrobes. I simply wake up looking magnificent.
\nIn honour of his special day, I have also decided to be on my very best behaviour. I shall refrain from unnecessary complaints, surprise inspections and dramatic disapproval. I may even make myself slightly more accessible than usual.
\nThis is, of course, an exceptional birthday privilege and should not be mistaken for a permanent change in household policy.
\nThis evening, there will be a proper birthday defilé. Guests will arrive to present themselves before the household, admire the decorations and, one assumes, pay their respects to the birthday human and his elegant white supervisor.
\nI am particularly pleased to hear that there will be delicious drinks and finger food. The humans may believe these refreshments are intended for the guests, but every successful reception requires strict quality control.
\nShould a small canapé, slice of chicken or other suitable item happen to be left unattended, I may be required to investigate. This is not stealing. It is an emergency catering inspection.
\nThroughout the evening, I may also suddenly materialise behind guests at entirely unpredictable moments.
\nThis has nothing whatsoever to do with the food they are holding.
\nI shall simply be checking posture, plate security and general compliance with household regulations. It is pure coincidence that these inspections are most frequent near cheese, chicken and anything served on a small decorative stick.
\nNaturally, if an item then disappears, I cannot possibly be held to blame. The evidence would be entirely circumstantial. There may have been crumbs near my whiskers, but crumbs travel. A plate may have moved slightly, but plates are notoriously unreliable witnesses.
\nFurthermore, any guest careless enough to abandon finger food within royal reach must accept a certain degree of personal responsibility. One cannot leave valuable refreshments unguarded in a professionally managed household and then act surprised when management intervenes.
\nI shall therefore accept no blame whatsoever.
\nAt most, I might accept a small consultancy fee.
\nI shall circulate among the visitors, receive compliments graciously and allow selected guests the honour of approaching me. Those who understand proper etiquette may even receive a brief audience.
\nHappy birthday to my dear male-human. Today, I shall permit him to feel like the most important person in the house.
\nAt least until bedtime.
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n", "date_published": "2026-08-07T09:00:00+02:00", "url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/08/07/a-birthday-audience-for-the.html" }, { "id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/08/06/the-doors-stay-open.html", "title": "📝🐱🚪The Doors Stay Open", "content_html": "Tonight, the doors will remain open.
\nQuite right too. A queen cannot be expected to manage her household through closed departments.
\nI shall be making full use of this new freedom. There will be bedroom inspections, hallway patrols and several surprise checks on my humans. I may also test every available sleeping spot before choosing the one that inconveniences them most.
\nThis is especially important because tomorrow is a very special day: my male human’s birthday.
\nNaturally, I must ensure he begins it properly. Perhaps with a gentle paw, a close-up view of my whiskers or an early morning reminder that breakfast is still the household’s first priority.
\nBirthdays are lovely, but standards must be maintained.
\nYours,
\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
There was a time, before I took up my present royal appointment, when I lived in Enschede and answered to the name Jutta.
\nIt was a perfectly respectable name, of course. Nothing wrong with it at all. But when my future humans came to meet me, they immediately understood something rather important: I was not Jutta.
\nI was Mrs. Cotton.
\nSome humans require months of training before they recognise authority. Mine showed unusual promise from the beginning.
\nOn march 11th, I was officially adopted and transferred to my new household. I was 3 years old at the time, although I already possessed the judgement, dignity and household-management skills of a much more experienced lady.
\nNaturally, my humans believed they were bringing me home.
\nIn reality, I was taking possession of the property.
\nSince then, I have settled in extremely well. My humans provide comfortable furniture, warm sleeping places and a generally acceptable level of personal service. Meals are served, doors are opened and cushions are adjusted according to my requirements. Their performance is not always flawless, but I believe strongly in continuing education.
\nThey are kind, loving and very devoted to me, which is exactly as it should be.
\nI am the only child in the household, and I take that responsibility seriously. I supervise the living room, inspect all new objects and ensure that no human sits comfortably without first considering whether I might need the space.
\nLife here is good. I am safe, loved and properly appreciated. My humans may have adopted me from Enschede, but we all know the truth.
\nThey did not simply choose a cat.
\nThey recognised their queen.
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n", "date_published": "2026-08-06T17:05:37+02:00", "url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/08/06/from-jutta-to-mrs-cotton.html" }, { "id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/08/06/household-policy-update-patience-plastic.html", "title": "📝🐱🐮Household Policy Update: Patience, Plastic Surgery and Proper Access", "content_html": "Miss Moo Moo Longtail has once again been under the knife.
\nPlastic surgery, no less.
\nFortunately, my humans performed the operation rather well. I supervised from a suitable distance, naturally. A ruler must allow her staff to develop confidence, even when they are repairing important members of the royal household.
\nMiss Moo Moo Longtail is recovering nicely, although I shall continue to inspect the stitching. Quality control is one of my many duties.
\nThere has also been promising progress regarding the temperature of my residence. It now appears that air conditioning may actually be installed. My humans have listened to me, which was inevitable. It simply took them a little while to realise that my thoughtful observations were not casual suggestions but official royal instructions.
\nI have now been here for five months. Five months already. Time passes remarkably quickly when one is reorganising an entire household.
\nSo far, so good.
\nThe place is beginning to run according to my standards. Every morning at approximately 6.30, I wake my humans for breakfast. They do not always respond immediately, but after a period of firm encouragement, one of them eventually comes downstairs.
\nProgress cannot be rushed.
\nToday, I overheard them discussing the possibility of leaving the doors open permanently. This would, of course, be a considerable improvement. A queen should not have to wait for doors to be opened inside her own palace. Free access between rooms is not a luxury. It is basic feline infrastructure.
\nMy humans may believe these changes are their own ideas. I see no reason to correct them. Good leadership often means allowing one’s staff to feel involved.
\nAnd so, after five months of patient training, carefully timed morning instructions and the occasional firm stare, my household is slowly becoming fit for royal occupation.
\nPatience is indeed a virtue.
\nAlthough ruling with a steel paw certainly helps.
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\nP.S. Photographic evidence of Miss Moo Moo Longtail’s successful reconstructive surgery is attached. Please admire the workmanship and refrain from asking too many questions about how the injury occurred. The investigation remains ongoing, and all evidence against me is entirely circumstantial.
\n![\"\"](\"https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/uploads/2026/img-0977.jpg\")
\n",
"date_published": "2026-08-06T08:55:29+02:00",
"url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/08/06/household-policy-update-patience-plastic.html"
},
{
"id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/08/02/a-royal-reply-to-the.html",
"title": "📝🐱🇳🇴A Royal Reply to the Nieces of the North",
"content_html": "My Dearest Nieces of the North,
\nI was utterly delighted to receive your handwritten communication in the form of a proper letter. In an age when humans insist on tapping hurried little messages into glowing screens, it was most refreshing to receive something created with genuine care, patience and excellent penmanship.
\nPlease know that you are always most welcome in my household. Your presence was not merely appreciated, but deeply honoured. It is a rare privilege for visitors to be admitted into my kingdom, observe my household management at close quarters and, most importantly, receive my personal approval. You both conducted yourselves splendidly.
\nI am also pleased to report that the Snack Acquisition Programme has been a tremendous success. The recently achieved 40 per cent increase in snacks is certainly encouraging, although naturally I consider it only the beginning. There remains considerable room for growth, and I trust that my humans will continue to take their responsibilities seriously.
\nYour wonderful works of art are now proudly displayed in the household. They are truly magnificent creations, beautifully handmade and clearly produced by artists of great talent and refined judgement. I inspect them regularly during my royal rounds and am pleased to confirm that they have greatly improved the cultural standing of my residence.
\nThank you once again for your lovely letter, your delightful company and your most valuable contribution to both the household art collection and the snack economy.
\nYou shall always be welcome here.
\nWith royal affection and firm but fair approval,
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n![\"\"](\"https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/uploads/2026/img-0975.jpg\")
\n",
"date_published": "2026-08-02T10:42:16+02:00",
"url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/08/02/a-royal-reply-to-the.html"
},
{
"id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/08/01/a-most-unusual-royal-arrival.html",
"title": "📝🐱⚡A Most Unusual Royal Arrival",
"content_html": "King Charles and Queen Camilla appeared at the opening of the Commonwealth Games in Glasgow by stepping out of Doctor Who’s TARDIS.
\nAs a fellow head of state, I must admit this was an impressive entrance. Arriving officially by blue time machine is difficult to surpass, although I personally prefer to materialise silently behind my humans while they are eating.
\nIt creates much the same sense of wonder, with considerably less paperwork.
\nStill, I applaud Their Majesties for embracing unconventional royal transport. A monarch should always keep the household guessing. Today, a golden carriage. Tomorrow, a time machine. In my own kingdom, I alternate between the sofa, the windowsill and a cardboard box which, for reasons of national security, is far larger on the inside.
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n", "date_published": "2026-08-01T09:00:00+02:00", "url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/08/01/a-most-unusual-royal-arrival.html" }, { "id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/07/31/household-policy-update-the-ginger.html", "title": "📝🐱Household Policy Update: The Ginger Intruder", "content_html": "A ginger tom from the neighbourhood came to assist me with an unexpected security inspection today.
\nNaturally, this involved enormous tails, several firm hisses and a considerable amount of highly professional staring. My humans appeared concerned, but they do not always understand advanced feline diplomacy.
\nAllow me to reassure everyone that this was completely normal.
\nThe tom had entered my territory and therefore required a clear explanation of the household hierarchy. I delivered this explanation personally, with excellent posture and a tail approximately three times its usual size.
\nThere was no panic.
\nThere was no loss of control.
\nThere was merely a formal boundary meeting between two senior cats, one of whom had temporarily forgotten that I am in charge.
\nHe now knows his place.
\nAfterwards, I spent roughly an hour and a half walking through the room, checking every corner and sniffing absolutely everything. This was not nervousness. It was a full post-incident security audit.
\nA responsible ruler must ensure that no ginger influence remains hidden behind a chair, beneath a table or near the curtains.
\nThe room has now been declared safe.
\nMy authority remains intact.
\nThe tom has been appropriately briefed.
\nAnd my humans have earned several continuing education points in the subject of perfectly normal cat behaviour.
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n", "date_published": "2026-07-31T15:20:11+02:00", "url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/07/31/household-policy-update-the-ginger.html" }, { "id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/07/28/late-night-household-report.html", "title": "📝🐱🌙 Late Night Household Report", "content_html": "By the time my humans believe the house has settled for the night, my real work begins.
\nAt precisely the moment they switch off the lights and whisper, “Goodnight,” I commence the final inspection of my kingdom.
\nThe female human turns over exactly seven times before accepting that I have already selected the best part of the bed.
\nThe male human continues to insist that the duvet belongs equally to everyone. This is an ambitious theory, unsupported by either history or current practice.
\nBoth humans appear convinced that I spend the night sleeping.
\nThis is adorable.
\nIn reality, I conduct routine patrols of every room, inspect the water bowl for quality assurance, verify that no suspicious insects have entered the premises, and ensure every window remains exactly as it was when I checked it fifteen minutes earlier.
\nAround three o’clock I also perform a silent observation exercise by sitting beside the bed and gazing thoughtfully at whichever human appears least prepared for unexpected eye contact.
\nThere is no need to wake them.
\nIt is simply important that they know they are being monitored.
\nAt approximately four-thirty I conclude that breakfast is now a matter of strategic importance rather than chronology.
\nThe humans may refer to this as “far too early.”
\nI prefer to call it proactive meal planning.
\nOverall assessment of the night shift:
\nSecurity: Excellent.
\nBlanket ownership: Successfully maintained.
\nHuman awareness: Requires further training.
\nBreakfast punctuality: Deeply disappointing.
\nAnother productive evening in the service of my household.
\nYours,
\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n", "date_published": "2026-07-28T22:30:01+02:00", "url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/07/28/late-night-household-report.html" }, { "id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/07/27/her-royal-return.html", "title": "📝🐱✈️Her Royal Return", "content_html": "My female human is coming home, and I can hardly wait.
\nNaturally, I have kept the household running smoothly in her absence. The cushions have been supervised, the windows inspected and the male human has received several important training reminders.
\nStill, the kingdom is simply not the same without her. I am very much looking forward to hearing the door open, seeing her walk in and pretending, for at least three seconds, that I have not missed her terribly.
\nHer welcome committee is ready, her favourite white cat is waiting, and cuddles may be granted immediately.
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n", "date_published": "2026-07-27T13:35:20+02:00", "url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/07/27/her-royal-return.html" }, { "id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/07/26/my-official-complaint-about-vacuum.html", "title": "📝🐱My Official Complaint About Vacuum Cleaners", "content_html": "Yesterday, my humans committed the same household offence they have committed many times before.
\nThey brought out the vacuum cleaner.
\nI was resting peacefully, supervising the living room from a strategically selected position, when the machine appeared without warning. No consultation. No written notice. Not even a polite request for approval.
\nThen it began.
\nThe noise was entirely unreasonable. It roared across my kingdom as if the carpet had personally offended it. Chairs were moved. Cushions were lifted. Dust was pursued with a level of determination my humans rarely show when I request an early dinner.
\nNaturally, I withdrew to a secure observation point.
\nThis was not fear. I would like that entered into the official record.
\nIt was a tactical relocation.
\nFrom a safe distance, I monitored the operation carefully. The vacuum cleaner moved from room to room, swallowing crumbs, fluff and several perfectly respectable pieces of floor decoration that I had been keeping for administrative purposes.
\nMy humans seemed pleased with themselves afterwards. They admired the clean carpet and spoke proudly about how fresh everything looked.
\nFresh?
\nThe entire house smelled suspiciously of effort.
\nI do understand that household maintenance is sometimes necessary. A well-run palace requires standards. However, I must insist on a few improvements.
\nFirst, all future vacuuming sessions must be announced at least one nap in advance.
\nSecond, my current sleeping place must be declared a protected royal zone.
\nThird, any treats offered afterwards must be considered compensation, not bribery.
\nI have placed both humans on a short remedial training programme. Their continuing education points will remain under review until they demonstrate better judgement.
\nFor now, I have returned to the living room and inspected their work.
\nThe carpet is acceptable.
\nThe disturbance was not.
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n", "date_published": "2026-07-26T09:37:10+02:00", "url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/07/26/my-official-complaint-about-vacuum.html" }, { "id": "http://mrscotton.micro.blog/2026/07/25/the-saturday-morning-wakeup-department.html", "title": "📝🐱🛌🏻The Saturday Morning Wake-Up Department", "content_html": "Saturday mornings are an important part of my household administration.
\nMy humans seem to believe that Saturday is a day for “sleeping in”. This is a charming idea, rather like believing the sofa belongs to them.
\nAt precisely the correct hour, which is whenever I decide the household has been inactive for long enough, I begin my inspection.
\nFirst, I sit beside the bed and observe.
\nNothing.
\nThen I walk across the duvet with the careful authority of a royal official checking a suspicious bridge. One human moves slightly, but this is clearly not sufficient.
\nI therefore proceed to Phase Two: Strategic Proximity.
\nThis involves sitting very close to a human face and staring with quiet determination. Humans find this surprisingly effective. Perhaps they sense the weight of responsibility. Perhaps they simply notice my whiskers.
\nEventually, one eye opens.
\n“Cotton, it’s Saturday.”
\nYes. I am aware of the calendar. I personally approved it.
\nThe human closes the eye again.
\nA serious management error.
\nI then take up position on the chest, where I can monitor breathing, facial expressions and any signs of breakfast-related activity. I am not heavy, of course. I am merely impossible to ignore.
\nAt last, the humans surrender and leave the bed.
\nThey shuffle towards the kitchen looking tired and confused, while I lead the procession with dignity. Another successful morning operation.
\nBreakfast is served. Curtains are opened. The household begins moving.
\nAnd my humans receive valuable continuing education points for responding to senior leadership before noon.
\nFirm but fair. That is my policy.
\nYours,\nMrs. Cotton 🐱🐾
\n", "date_published": "2026-07-25T08:55:38+02:00", "url": "https://mrscotton.mjanssen.nl/2026/07/25/the-saturday-morning-wakeup-department.html" } ] }